Depression and regrets indicate we are living in the past and anxiety indicates that we are living in the future.  With so many people suffering from these afflictions, the quest for a healthier life is ever more necessary.

This month I spoke with Cherry Tyfield, a Life Alignment Practitioner and Advanced Teacher living in the UK. Cherry knows that the only way to live is NOW.  Worry becomes less when you are focused on the present moment.

Living in the NOW is easier said than done, right?  It is difficult to realise when we are not in the moment. You’re sitting on your couch, watching a movie while eating crisps, scrolling through your phone, and listening to your partner talk while you’re thinking about a task that you need to do tomorrow. Only later do you realise you didn’t quite understand the movie, remember the flavour of the snack, nor hear what your partner said. On top of it you certainly don’t feel relaxed or rejuvenated.

We are constantly surrounded by distractions, making it difficult to focus on just one thing at a time. Multitasking, thinking about the past and worrying about the future can make it difficult to enjoy the good things in your life.  Living in the moment, although difficult, benefits your relationships, productivity, and, most importantly, overall wellness. Learning about being more mindful is about paying attention to the here and now. Instead of letting your mind wander, you’re focused on your current actions, sensations, and surroundings.

 

Cherry, what made you realize the importance of living in the present?

In South Africa in 2015 we were attending a Life Alignment conference.  I was going to give a presentation and was a nervous wreck.  All I can remember is how nervous I was to get this presentation perfect, and I had prepared like crazy.

Jeff had just downloaded the Presence card and we were all given one.  I put the card on my heart point in my bra and literally as I put the card there, I just felt all the nerves, anxiety, need for perfection just drop as if it was dropping into the earth, into the ground.  My centre of gravity changed at that moment.  I had written notes, I knew what I wanted to say.  I didn’t even need to use my notes. I ended up talking off the cuff from the heart and soul.  A lot of people cried that day, including me!

 

This is all very interesting – a further question that is asked again and again: 

When living in the present – how does “present me” make any decisions and plans for “future me”?  Where is that fine line between not making plans about the future and living too much in the future? 

We can still be in the present even if we’re making plans for the future.  We have to plan ahead, otherwise nothing will get done. We can consciously do this, and not wait for the Universe to decide our fate. This is making empowered choices for our lives. We make decisions with the knowledge, insight and wisdom we’ve gained from past experience, with the fluidity to adapt to circumstances should they arise. Don’t get stuck in the “when this happens, then that will…”.  Don’t allow dreaming about tomorrow to replace living in the moment. Dreaming about the future is only productive when combined with action taken today!

We all spend time in the future and the past. That’s natural and healthy. But it should be a visit, not an extended stay. If we are stuck in the past, we can’t enjoy the present moment.

Be present in the planning of the future.  Don’t wish away the present but use the present to plan intelligently for the future.  Time is a precious commodity. Don’t mentally rush through it or wish it away.  In the slower moments of life, being present in the moment will increase your appreciation and relaxation in them, as opposed to anxiety or depression if your mind is focused elsewhere in time.

 

You don’t have to stop thinking or planning for the future – just don’t live there.

 

What can you tell us about what benefits there are for living in the present?  And HOW can we implement being mindful of being present?  How can people identify distraction and what can they do to become more present? 

1. Experience Joy and Fulfilment: When we focus on the present, we become fully engaged with our experiences, relationships, and surroundings.   We practice focussing on the present by ensuring that we monotask.   Meditation and breathing techniques are also tools that we can use.
2. Reduce Stress and Anxiety: Much of our stress and anxiety stems from ruminating over the past or worrying about the future. The present moment offers a respite from these concerns. By shifting our attention to the now, we can alleviate stress, calm our minds, and find a sense of inner peace.
3. Enhance Relationships: Being present in our interactions with others allows us to truly connect and listen. It helps us understand others more deeply, respond with empathy, and foster meaningful connections. By giving our full attention to the present moment, we can nurture and strengthen our relationships.
4. Improve Mental Clarity and Focus: When we live in the present, our minds are not clouded by regrets or anxieties. This clarity of mind allows us to make better decisions, improve concentration, and enhance productivity. We can fully immerse ourselves in tasks and activities, leading to greater efficiency and effectiveness.
5. Embrace Change and Adaptability: The present moment is the only place where we have the power to act and make a difference. By focusing on the now, we become more adaptable and responsive to the ever-changing circumstances of life. We can let go of regrets and embrace new opportunities with openness and resilience.
6. And lastly: explore practical techniques to incorporate mindfulness into your everyday routine and experience a more vibrant and fulfilling life.  A  Life Alignment  balance really helps with this.

 

How can people identify distraction and what can they do to become more present? 

It is a matter of awareness. It is very easy to disappear down the rabbit hole and get stuck down there! With our Life Alignment tools, we can bring an awareness to whatever is happening – the bad, as well as the good. Doing a body scan to see where the stress is caught in the body, and then breathe deeply with intention to bring energy, peace, and calm into that area. Breath and feelings of stillness are very connected. We have to practice presence, like everything else, it gets stronger with practice!

 

 

Thank you, Cherry.  Everyone kind of knows the benefits of the present moment, but I don’t think a lot of people always understand the consequences, so, what advice can you give us to be the best possible version of ourselves? 

• Each new day brings with it an important choice: either we fill it with our best or we allow it to slip away. There is no other option—the hours are going to pass anyway. Choosing to work hard (whether in your profession or working hard at relaxation, social engagements or spending time with your loved ones) makes the most of these hours.
• Be aware of how much more productive you are when fully engaged in a task. Compare this with trying to squeeze multiple things into one period of time or dividing your energy on three different projects.
• To be the best possible version of yourself, you need to learn how to be more present; forget about how you think things should be and accept them for what they are.  
• Soak in as much of  today  as you possibly can – the sights, the sounds, the smells, the emotions, the triumph, and the sorrow. These are in our daily lives, but we often forget to take them in and truly appreciate them.

 

 

How can a Life Alignment balance promote living in the present moment?  

Being a Life Alignment practitioner means that we learn the necessary tools to assist our clients to be less stuck in the past or future.  The Practitioner will identify body points and relevant emotions that are then worked on.  By clearing the past, we can be more present and by building trust and confidence we can be in harmony with the flow of the future.  this is what LA is all about – clearing the issues or traumas from our childhood, or issues that no longer serve us, so that we can make our present-day decisions and life choices not influenced by the past. This brings us fully into our true nature, in connection with what is right for us now. This, of course, changes constantly, depending on our circumstances and life situations and we know that nothing is permanent, life is fluid and we have to be flexible with what is, and what comes up for us.

 

If you can only live one moment at a time, you might as well make it the present.